Fear of (Whales) Drowning

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If whales open their mouths too much when they swim, can they drown? 
— Lucas, 5.

More Heavy Heaven Talk from a 5-year old

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Overheard this morning, a 5-year old to a 3-year old:


Lucas: Do you know what heaven is?
Diego: No.
Lucas: It's where you go when you get really sick or really old or like when a dog swallows a blanket.
Diego: Oh.

Breaking Roofs or Talking to God

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Another, 'almost too good to be true' story from our 5-year old questioner of everything. This one really left me scratching my head. I was literally, way out of my league. He wasn't, apparently.


So, we're on our way to visit my 93-year old grandfather who's been ailing for about a year now. My son asks me if he's still sick and I tell him the truth, 


"Yes, but he's still hanging in there." 


He looks at me and says, "Maybe he'll go to heaven soon, right?" I tell him only God knows that.


He says, "God can see everything from far, far away right?" I say yes.


The he says: "So how do people go up to heaven, do they break the roof or something?" I couldn't come up with an answer for that one, so I told him I didn't know.


He says, "Jesus might know. He sees far, far away too, right? Let me ask him... (He starts talking out loud): Jesus, Jesus, do you know, do you... Papi, I don't hear an answer. He doesn't hear me...

My grip on religious and metaphysical subjects is tenuous at best, so at that very moment, we arrived at my grandfather's house and I was able to change the subject. 


Thank God.

Floating Kid

Yesterday, after a birthday party, we come home with balloons, of course. After playing with them for a while, Lucas looks at his and asks me:


"Papi, what makes balloons float?"


Me: It's a gas called helium.
Lucas: What's a gas?
Me: It's like air, you can't see it, but it's there.


Lucas thinks and replies,


"Wow, what if I break the balloon, put the gas on my stomach and then maybe I can float too!"